Batman #700- Clubhouse Chat

Alan's take:

Monster barbecue! Grant Morrison continues his Elvis Costello-esque track record of doing whatever the hell he wants with Batman, readers be damned. I really hope that no casual readers picked up this issue in hopes of getting into Batman, because a Morrison time travel story with several different artists can be difficult to follow. As a Batman/Morrison fan, I really enjoyed this issue, and the idea that "there will always be Batman" made me feel . . . safe.

I felt like Morrison didn't have as firm a grasp on Bruce/Dick as he did on Dick/Damain, and that's likely because he's used to writing for his current team. It was fun to see a lighter side of the Joker in the first "chapter" with the Batman of the past, and then watch the progression of Batman villains to more and more psychotic, like 2-Face-2. In the end, the mystery doesn't matter, because it's time travel, but this was a really fun milestone issue. A lot of the time, big-deal issues suck, because it seems like the writers know everyone will buy number 700 or whatever number they're up to, but I have a feeling this issue will be important later, especially the Damian Wayne future stuff. I could write more, but this is a round-table, so I defer to J-Gatts.

Jon's take:

I have to agree with Alan that Batman #700 really works best when Morrison is writing his current team, or any scene featuring Damian. I'm beginning to believe that he's actually got a firmer grip on Damian than he does on Bruce, but it makes sense as Bruce is not his creation. If you would've told me even a few years ago that I'd think Batman having a son was not only a good idea, but that he'd be end up as one of the best characters in the DCU, I probably would've farted on your head.

(However, bringing Jason Todd back will always be a stupid idea).

Farts and Jason "who gives a shit" Todd aside, there's almost too much to love about Batman #700. I loved the '70s Batman opener. I love the classic Riddler costume, love old Catwoman costume (me-ow), and I love anything with a fun-lovin' Joker. I love that the Mutant Gang showed up to the party. The cover gallery in the back was incredible. But most of all, man do I ever love "Trenchcoat Future Batman." What I wouldn't give for that Batman to have his own series. Batman Beyond is fine and all, but holy shit Damian as Batman is a scary and awesome sight to behold. Ever since Batman #666, I've been dying to see more of that world. Just look at 2-Face-2!!! Kuato lives!

Morrison has totally redefined Batman much in the same way Frank Miller did with Dark Knight Returns. If it weren't clear enough before Batman #700, it sure as hell is now. Yet unlike Miller's four-issue sucker-punch, Morrison is changing Batman over the course of years and across at least three series. The differences hardly stop there. While Miller re-invented the bare-knuckle Batman, Morrison is more concerned with legitimizing the wildly weird sci-fi side of Batman, creating a continuity that is as colorful and bizarre as the '60s television show, minus the ridiculous idiocy. In many ways, Morrison's angle is a much more fun, albeit challenging, take on the caped crusader. While Miller's story did take Batman into the future, it was still a very grit-and-grisly Batman (not to mention he was a bit of a right-wing psycho). Despite all my Morrison v. Miller talk, there's that brief appearance of the Mutant Gang in Batman #700, which was one of my favorite parts of the issue. It was a stark reminder that even the briefest reference to the Miller's work brings back happy memories of reading DKR for the first time.

So before this devolves into another Damian-loving-lecture, I'll pass things over to the man in the ringmaster's hat, Mr. Mucci.

Tim's take:

Despite how anyone might feel about Morrison's writing style, he's a risk taker. Instead of populating his stories with exposition to tell the reader what came before, he lets us infer from what's happening now-- which depends a lot on the abilities of the artist, and the artists show up in full force here. In lieu of exposition Morrison jam-packs his stories with ideas, like Batman throughout time (an idea he's exploring in the Return of Bruce Wayne series), how Batman's villains might evolve throughout time, and how the concept of Batman might change physically...but the core character is always the same.

As for the guts of Batman #700, I loved it. I didn't love it at first because Morrison did that thing he does where he tosses you in the middle of a story and leaves you to puzzle out the when, where and why of it all. Once it switched over from the Silver Age "Caped Crusader" to the modern day Dick Grayson Batman I figure out the hook and went along for the ride. Alan's right in that this isn't an issue for those old school collectors who want a big event storyline, but it's a great issue jam packed with Batman theory.

Batman theory? Did I just make up a new philosophy? Morrison made me do it!

Jonny Gatts brings up a good point with the Morrison v. Miller comparison. It seems like Morrison is working really hard to give the reader a new point of reference concerning Batman, closing the book on the Miller stuff that's been influencing the character for so many years and hybridizing the Dark Knight Detective, Martial Arts Master with the Silver Age weirdo science incarnation.

Anyway #700 is a great little Maybe-story featuring a Batman for everyone!

Book Club- "Pleasure Model"

by Matt Haws

As a resident WC-er and lover of all things nerdy/cheesy, Mr. Jon G. recommended that I read “Pleasure Model,” by Christopher Rowley, a pulpy sci-fi noir male fantasy which somewhat resembles a novel, and give all of you the low-down.

Released by TOR Books as the flagship of their new “Heavy Metal Pulp” line, “Pleasure Model” promises “noir fiction with fantastic art featuring the themes, story lines, and graphic styles of Heavy Metal magazine.” Are you excited yet??

In the future, New York City is a dark, rainy cesspit crawling with intrigue. Rook Verner is a bad-ass not-fucking-around cop whose investigation into what seems like a routine homicide leads him down the rabbit hole of government conspiracy and turns him into Public Enemy #1. The only clue that might lead him to the truth is Plesur, a artificially engineered “Pleasure Model,” (hence the title!) a very expensive sex toy for the rich and powerful. Plesur features a perfect body that “works like triggers on the heterosexual male mind” but, on the downside, only possesses “the intelligence of a blueberry.” For some mysterious reason, every federally-owned robot with a big gun and government agent in an invisibility suit is desperate to kill poor Plesur, so Rook has to do everything he can to protect her like the bad-ass cop he is. But he wasn’t counting on falling in love!

Noir-ish character clichés abound, of course. Rook is the quintessential hardcore cop: ruggedly handsome, divorced, a loner who never lets anybody get too close, willing to cut through red tape and get the job done no matter who he pisses off. Plesur is the perfect damsel in distress: gorgeous, innocent, vulnerable. She’s the one ray of sunshine in Rook’s dark and gloomy life.

Early in the book we’re introduced to a woman with a dual personality - she’s simultaneously Mistress Julia, cold and confident dominatrix, and Angie, scared and vulnerable little girl. That conflict more or less characterizes every denizen of this noir world, all them doing their best to be hard, cynical, jaded urbanites who don’t give a damn, but gosh darn it if they aren’t all just hurting so much on the inside. It’s difficult and painful, but in the end they all have no choice but to speak in flippant, pithy one-liners just to survive in this messed-up world. The one exception is Plesur, whose simplicity and complete innocence (she’s designed to be a sex toy, and yet she’s a virgin) charms everybody around her, especially lonely, horny, yet too-principled-to-take-
advantage Rook.

The picture on the cover shows big robots and scantily clad sexy women, and in this respect the book certainly delivers what it promises. Gender roles are clear-cut and defined. Men are bad-asses, muscular and strong, and women, while bad-asses too, are all curvy, voluptuous vixens. Every page is charged with eroticism aimed at the male mind, and yet in such a simplistic and unsophisticated way that I imagine my heterosexual male friends would be more likely to laugh than get aroused by all this silliness. The single sex scene is surprisingly tame, as though written by or for somebody who has never actually had sex. In fact, the whole book seems like it was written to be marketed to somewhat intelligent, pretty shy, and very horny 13 year old boys, who are big on desire but vague on all the details.

The author has a few good ideas and a few interesting scenes. He clearly has a story he’s trying to tell, though in this installment (the first of a trilogy) very little of it gets told. Instead, I imagine an editor standing over his shoulder saying “Dumb it down! Make it sexier!” The prose style is so straightforward and simplistic that it seems only one small step above the “Clone Wars Adventures!” novels the targeted 13-year old boys were probably reading before they discovered this book. The “young adult novel” effect is not helped by the small pictures sprinkled through each chapter, which are pretty much superfluous and seem designed to try to trick kids into believing that they are reading something more like a comic book, as well as provide an excuse to draw cartoonishly large breasts and show off Rook in a variety of bad-ass poses. There is one set of pictures at the book’s climax that is kind of fun, if for no other reason for how over-the-top it is. Keep your eyes open for it! Overall, though, the pictures add nothing and I found myself ignoring them.

All that said, I actually liked the first half of the book more than expected, even enjoying the clichés for all their shallowness. After all, this is a genre that is defined by its clichés. Just how noir would we find it if Rook was a plain-looking, happily married cop with lots of friends who always toed the line? Not very much at all, thank you very much. The early chapters establish the setting with a good mix of general mood and specific details. I particularly liked Rook’s Nokia, a super smart-phone with an artificial intelligence that can do pretty much anything - which seems believable given all the crazy phones they keep coming out with each year.

Unfortunately, the book begins to stumble in its second half, feeling somewhat rushed and haphazard. Characters get killed off for no other reason than it seems like the author no longer knows what to do with them. Plot twists come so fast they are almost afterthoughts, as though the author is saying “Oh, by the way, I forgot to mention, but the intelligence upgrade also gives you superhuman reflexes. FYI.” The dialogue, which at the beginning seemed carefully crafted to be gritty noir cliché, becomes completely uninspired, and several lines turn downright comical. Of course, I have to share my favorites with all of you.

I actually almost completely passed over my first favorite line. I got bored and skipped over a couple of paragraphs, then forced myself to go back when I realized I had missed something and didn’t know what was going on anymore. I was rewarded for the effort with this wonderful line:

An obese lady in a red corduroy suit suddenly fell over, blocking an aisle.

Just give that one a second to sink in. It’s a delightful image.

Finally, at the end of the book, our heroes confront a key character who might actually have the answers to all the questions that have chased them through 238 pages and 21 chapters. Before he can reveal anything, though, his head explodes! This leads to the following brilliant exchange between Rook and his associate:

“No,” said Rook. “He must have had an explosive chip in his head.”

Nancy wiped at the gristle on her clothes. “That is some fucked up shit.”

Indeed, Nancy. Indeed.

In the end, I found the clumsiness and lack of pretension of “Pleasure Model” to be kind of endearing and fun. The book is just short enough to be an entertaining diversion without quite getting tedious. If you enjoy a cheesy romp through ham-handed futuristic noir, or if you are horny 13 year old boy looking for titillation, then this book is for you!

Comic reviews -- Week of June 9th

DARK HORSE:



Predators #1: Ah, movie tie-ins--they get such a bad reputation. I had low expectations going into issue one of the Dark Horse Predators prequel miniseries, but I had a good time. The issue is broken up into two stories. The first, "Welcome to the Jungle," follows a team of ultimate bad-asses as they are dropped into a jungle and slowly picked off one by one, leaving only Drake, the protagonist, alive. His chapter ends with him coming face to face with a Predator, but there is a cool twist that makes me want to pick-up next week's issue. The artist has a great handle on gore, and the dialog is spot on. "Welcome to the Jungle" was enough to get me hooked, while the second story, "A Predatory Life," was forgettable. This story follows what looks like Adrian Brody as he is tasked with taking down a terrorist who has taken control of an African jungle. Brody is to be paid highly for his services, but the general insists that he be escorted by a government soldier. Brody smells a trap . . . So far, this story has no action and no Predator, so it's not living up to my (low) expectations. The story is something I've seen before, but unlike the first story (which was essentially a retread of the first Predator film), this one was boring and added nothing new. I wouldn't come back to this series if it were only this second story, but because "Jungle" was great, I'll give the next issue a shot. It was only three dollars, too!

MARVEL:



Captain America #606: Well, the Butch is back. Butch Guice is once again lending his beautiful pencils to Captain America, and the series is all the better for it. Not only is Guice back with his fantastically-detailed pencils, but with him comes Baron Zemo, who's pissed off about Bucky taking up the Cap mantle. I thought last arc's "villain" was cool, but this new Heroic Age has led to the death of the "gray area" and has allowed for heroes and villains to return to their classic roles. Zemo is a villain again, and his first order of business is finishing the work his father started--killing Bucky. The arc has a great setup, and Brubaker must think in these characters' voices--he's got these characterizations down so well, I almost hate it when the Cap characters pop up in other series, because they never talk quite the right way. Falcon never says, "Aw, crud" anywhere else, and I've got Brubaker to thank for it. I'd kill for this series to be a weekly.

Comic Reviews -- Week of June 9th

MARVEL:

Nemesis #2: I should have tossed this comic aside when Millar revealed Nemesis' lair -- a futuristic (and brightly lit) type of Batcave -- with a TABLE FULL OF BLOW!!! Most hosts would offer a drink of some type, or at least a light snack. Nemesis? He offers lines of cocaine, and tells his henchmen to "Sit down and enjoy a couple of lines. I'm thinking up riddles for our brilliant Chief of Police." So, basically while his lackey's get high as kites, he muses on the clever ways he can confuse his arch enemy. I should have tossed it aside when the president's head of homeland security asked Blake Morrow, "Do you want fries with that?" because he feels like Morrow is overstepping his bounds. But I didn't. Additionally, Millar blatantly rips off The Dark Knight by giving Nemesis a "Nemesis-Pod" that launches out of his Audi roadster. And lastly, the issue ends with the classic, "I planned to get caught!" line. Jesus wept. This is a shit sandwich with shit sauce. I can't tell if this is a brilliant ploy to expose the idiocy of the American public, or if he seriously feels this is a good story. This is trash -- but not even good trash. It's unsophisticated, empty, and hollow. I'm disappointed in Mark Millar because I normally look forward to his stories because of their grand scope. Here, he seems to be trying too hard to outdo himself. It's not working. Simple storytelling is Millar's area of expertise. He needs to go back there before he makes a bad name for himself.

Ultimate Avengers 2 #3: This is a pretty mediocre issue with a mediocre ending. Compared to the two previous outings, though, this is like Melville. It's much more interesting than Millar's earlier efforts, but it's still Millar desperately trying to make his story interesting. Poor Leinil Yu. His art is superb in this series, and his Ghost Rider illustrations are top notch. But he's still drawing a Millar story so it's attempting to be grand and explosive, but forcing the action a bit too much. If you pass on this, you won't be missing much. Actually, you won't be missing anything.

Ultimate Spider-Man #11: David LaFuente's art is the highlight of the issue. Its really grown on me, and I'm glad that people like Bendis and Quesada had faith in him because his work definitely suits the Marvel Universe. Bendis throws in his usual humor -- witty dialogue and clever situations -- but the issue clips along at an incredible pace so that when you get to the last page, you feel the sense of shock that Bendis was trying to convey. Millar should take a hint from Bendis: good characters make good story. Interesting story plus flat characters equals mediocre results. I think we're seeing Ultimate Chameleon's introduction into the Ultimate Universe. This is an exciting time to be reading Ultimate Spider-Man.

IMAGE:

The Light #3 (Edmondson & Weldele): Much like Robert Kirkman's Walking Dead series, Nathan Edmonson seems to be showing that in the face of apocalyptic disaster, survivors are the greatest threat. We still don't know what caused the light to become toxic, but I kind of hope we never do. That mystery is one worth saving, seeing as how the series closes out in two issues. At the end of the issue, the mystery takes an interesting turn. I don't like that this is ending in two issues because there's a lot more story to tell. Hopefully this is only the first part in a longer series. If you haven't read the Light, I highly recommend it. The Light is a great new series.

MISC:

Logans' Run: Last Day #3 (Blue Water -- Salamoff & Gete): I love this damn series! Paul J. Salamoff perfectly balances Logan's story and the Sandmen's story, as well as keeping the heart of series so prevalent. Salamoff shows us Logan's brutality, but offsets this with Jessica's humanity. I like how she has the opportunity to end Logan's life, but she doesn't take it because she's "seen enough death." I'm conflicted because I want to read William F. Nolan's novel, but I'm afraid it will dampen the experience of Salamoff's series. For now, I'll stick to the comics -- the art and story are completely engrossing. But at some point, I'll turn to the novel. If Paul Salamoff can be credited with at least one thing, it's bringing interest back to the original Logan's Run story. Read Logan's Run: Last Day. It's worth the time and money.

Write Club Funnies! - Getting the Band Back Together

More Write Club Funnies...

Comic Reviews -- Week of June 2

MARVEL:

Stephen King's N #4: What I need to do now is read the actual short story "N" to see how well Marc Guggenheim and Alex Maleev translated it. I can tell you that from the viewpoint of someone who has never read this story, this comic was phenomenal. Maleev's art was at first jarring. But now, I don't think the series would have succeeded without it. The pseudo realistic art is necessary in presenting the human aspect of the story. Humanity, in King's work, is always an undercurrent. "N" is no different. Marc Guggenhiem understands King, grasps his language perfectly, and knows what to cut out and what to leave in. He knows what parts make the story a Stephen King story, is what I'm trying to say. I think Marvel may have discovered something pretty phenomenal here. They can do comic translations of King's best stories. I only hope that they have talent like Guggenheim and Maleev on board.

DC:

Red Hood: The Lost Days #1: Judd Winick has done some stuff I really enjoy, particularly Green Arrow and Batman. So, when I saw this title, I wanted to pass on it. I mean, who really cares what the Red Hood did during his time away from Gotham? It reminds me of Ben Reilly's "Lost Years" series where we learned of the time between when Ben Reilly left New York City, and then returned to take over as Spider-Man. So what does The Lost Days offer? Nothing really. The last page is the only interesting part of the issue, but before that, it plays off of Winick's Batman Annual #25, so if you haven't read that issue, Winick makes no apology for you not knowing how Jason came back. This seems like a take it or leave it series -- I don't think it has much bearing in the entire DCU. Maybe it was fan motivated, or commercially motivated (because I know I'm not the only one that bought it). Either way, I don't think you need to read this series. Batman will continue to be Batman regardless of it.

Red Robin #13: I can't believe I was ready to drop this series! I know that Fabien Nicieza is now in charge of the writing duties, but the feel is still the same. Tim is still trying to figure out his place in Gotham, as well as managing his identity and his relationships. It's almost like the feel that Batman first had has now been supplanted in Tim Drake. There's no heavy continuity that weighs the character down, and Nicieza shows that Tim really enjoys his role. I love that Tim plays "nice" with a character until she pisses him off. Then he ends the fight very quickly. This is a fun series to read, and I think its strength lies in how light it is. Considering how dark Batman is supposed to be, it's nice to see a lighter take on the characters.

Nemesis -- The Impostors #4: I enjoyed the hell out of this series! Cliff Richards's art is phenomenal. And Ivan Brandon knows how to write a gripping, exciting story that balances exposition and action. If anyone out there knows people at DC, I beg you to push them to give Nemesis his own series. I think Nemesis -- The Impostors proves that Ivan Brandon can handle the more familiar characters of the DC Universe.

Brightest Day #3: I could care less about the Firestorm conflict, nor do I find the Hawkman mystery all that interesting, but the rest of the story is fascinating. We're still not getting any major answers, but I trust that we'll at least get them. It just might not be for a while. As for now, I'm hooked. If you enjoy mysteries, you should read Brightest Day. It's definitely one of the most epic mysteries I've read in that it involves major and minor DC characters. It's frustrating to read because I cant' figure out a damn thing! But I want to know more, and that will keep me reading.

MISC:

Irredeemable #14 (BOOM! -- Waid & Barret0): We're getting a little more plot now. The series felt like it stalled for a few issues, but it's starting to pick up again. I'm not completely sold in that I don't know how much longer Waid can keep this going. I'm interested in the characters, but I feel like I don't really know any of them, so I'm not completely sure who they are, or how they play into the plot. I'm going to give Irredeemable a few more issues to solve some of its issues, but if the series doesn't pick up, I'm going to end up dropping it. There's a lot to read out there, and a lot of writers who have created more intriguing plots. It hurts to say that about Mark Waid, but this series isn't as gripping as his others. I hope Irredeemable picks up because if it doesn't, my $3.99 will go to something else.

Sweet Tooth #10 (Vertigo -- Lemire): Here we go!! Jeff Lemire delves into Gus's past, but not in the traditional sense. We don't get an origin story. We still don't know how Gus came to be, but we do know that Gus's father is quite the whack job. Lemire chooses hypnotism to give us Gus's background so we see both younger and older Gus. The effect is that we're again reminded of his innocence, and how much he is a victim of his heredity and environment. We also know that when Tommy gets reunited with Gus, it will most likely be a very bloody encounter. Sweet Tooth churns forward a little more this month, and it looks like there will be more reveals about Gus's past in following issues. If they're anything like this one, we can expect quite a bit more from Jeff Lemire.

iZombie #2 (Vertigo -- Roberson & Allred): iZombie #2 works better than #1. We're given a little more in terms of the mythos of the series, and the initial mysteries around which the series revolves. And I'm hooked. Michael Allred's pop art works well for the series in that it mirrors older comics, like Archie. I can't figure out why he does this -- maybe it's because the mood of the piece is dark enough already so that a little levity will detract from the nature of the series. Additionally, Chris Roberson's dialogue can be laugh out loud funny. Gwen, as a character, is interesting, but nowhere near as interesting as her supporting cast and this is where iZombie shines. And as seen in Irredeemable, a supporting cast can make or break a series. And in iZombie, the supporting characters make the series worth reading.

The Waking #4 (Zenescope -- Gregory & Drujiniu): When I saw this on the shelf, I knew my comic week was going to be great.

Chimichanga #2 (Albatross Exploding Funny Books -- Powell): Visually strange, and filled with heart, Chimichanga is the story of the "freaks" as we see them, and the real "freaks" of society: people who are willing to deform humanity in the interest of business, whereas the natural freaks are entertaining and caring. Weirdly funny and visually engaging, Chimichanga is a brilliant series. If you want to read a "different" comic, one that is out of the realm of accepted comic books, read this comic. It's one of the best comics I've ever read.

Bannen's Book of the Week:

The Waking #4: As with most mysteries, the explanation isn't as good as the journey there. Plus, every loose end is tied up so there's no room left for questions. But the ending is hella creepy. I know that Raven Gregory has written other continuous series, and I hope he does the same thing here because The Waking was the best new take on the Zombie story. And it leaves it open for more story. I've raved enough about this in the past, so I don't need more space to do that again. For me, The Waking set the bar for new comic book series, and the bar is set pretty high.

This Week in Cool: Lovecraft Edition

Anyone who knows me will tell you that I'm a huge Lovecraft fan; enormous, Brobdingnagian even--so when I'd discovered that Observatory, a Brooklyn art space which describes itself as a presentation/exhibition space, was hosting an art show based off of Lovecraft-inspired works I had to go. The event was called "A LOVE CRAFT: Art Inspired by Monsters, Madness and Mythos."

Observatory is located down a back alleyway in an extremely industrial area right off of the Gowanus canal, which added to the mood.

The art was good. Many of the artists focused on the tentacular horror aspect of Lovecraft's work, and a lot of the images represented can already be seen in the pages of the Call of Cthulhu role-playing game. Not that it wasn't interesting seeing them up close. A few of the most stand-out pieces were photo-manipulation works, which stood out from the crowd because of how different they were.

Here are a few of the pieces that I took photos of, for more information about the event, and the artists, visit the Observatory's web-site: http://observatoryroom.org/2010/05/26/exhibition-opening-a-love-craft/

Sub*Text Saturday - 06/12/10

Hey everybody, just leeching a bit of internet from a neighbor so I can post up the best of the best when it comes to Lit, Flicks, Pics, & Vids.


First up is Augusten Burrough's:
DRY: a memior

In Dry, a follow-up to his shocking and hilarious childhood memoir, "Running with Scissors," Augusten Burroughs recounts his introduction into recovery from alcoholism.

"Squalor" is the only word that comes to Burroughs mind upon returning from rehab to his Manhattan apartment, "filled with empty Dewar's bottles, hundreds of empty Dewar's bottles. They cover all surfaces; the counters in the kitchen, the top of the refrigerator. They are under the table I use as a desk, dozens of them there, with a small clearing for my feet... And then I see them: fruit flies, hovering at the mouths of the bottles. They form dark clouds at the ceiling above the kitchen sink. And dead fruit flies cover everything, like dust."

Memoirs usually aren't my bag, and I've avoided any books the likes of Sedaris, but someone told me to read this and so I did. I never enjoyed drinking a beer so much as after I finished this book. I appreciated alcohol like never before, because I knew I could handle it in moderation and not litter my apartment with 40 Dewar's bottles. Oddly, I read this just as my dad entered rehab for basically replacing his blood with Scotch. He apparently badgered the other "clients" with blunt honesty about their problems, ever the callous mechanic, with no bedside manner.

I didn't love it, but it's opened my eyes to more popular books of the day, and made me appreciate a nice solid read with a well structured and precise writer such as Augusten Burroughs.

***

THIS WILL BE THE MOST AMAZING THING YOU'LL WITNESS IN YOUR LIFETIME!

Yes, the greatest movie ever has officially been made. I present:
NORWEGIAN NINJA



You're welcome.

***

Storm's a-Comin' by Stu Horvath



***

I know I'm way late on this one, but my GOD do I love Hot Chip. I'd heard OF them, but someone from work suggested I check them out. I Googled and got this video, which I thought was real, up until Jesus Moby shoots lightning out of his mouth. Just watch.

HOT CHIP - 'I Feel Better'

"The Creation of Muppet"

It's no secret that we here at WC have a soft spot for the Muppets. So when I came across this painting the other morning, I knew it had to be posted. It's drawn by British artist Jim Jeroo. His picture account said there should be prints up for sale soon, so if you want one, keep your eyes open.

This next piece comes via MSNBC and Brian Williams...hey, who said comic nerds don't watch the news? (Well, actually, we don't; I found this off Bleeding Cool. That's news, right?)

Anyway, in this short, online-only clip, Williams takes Frank Oz, the last of the original Muppeteers, to a set of pipes that were painted by Jim Henson and crew when they were still working "The Jack Paar Show" for NBC. It's a touching and bittersweet moment for Oz and for anybody who grew up with the Muppets.



For the first time in my life, I actually want to visit NBC Studios. If you want more, Bleeding Cool is also hosting a clip of Jim Henson visiting the pipes with Gene Shalit.

More Thor!

ET has an exclusive look at the upcoming Thor movie. The piece was mainly fast-forwardable talking heads, but they did show some behind-the-scenes footage including Anthony Hopkins as Odin, and Idris Elba as Heimdall.

Watch the Vid on Geek Tyrant!

Comic Reviews -- Week of June 2nd

MARVEL:

Philip K. Dick's Electric Ant #3: Ok Electric Ant. Now I'm just confused. No, no, not about the story; I've read enough "mind-bending" science fiction to keep up. What is really throwing me is the roller-coaster quality of this comic. I swear, I go from interested to totally bored on a page to page basis. However, this was probably the best issue in the series so far. It finally went moved the story in an interesting and unique direction, as writer David Mack and artist Pascal Alixe finally start to take advantage of the comic book's inherent and individual possibilities for telling a Dick-ian story about (among other things) disassembling objective reality. We're now more than halfway through this limited series, and I honestly still don't know how I feel about it, other than I know the Paul Pope covers might be too pretty for such a inconsistent read.

Franken-Castle #17: IT. IS. ALIVE! Punisher is now Franken-Castle (albeit temporarily). I've been an outspoken supporter of Remender's run on the Punisher ever since he turned Frank into a re-assembled killer carcass, and with issue #17 it's clear that despite this drastic transformation, Remender is actually going to tie the story back into the events of the his opening "Living in Darkness" arc. It's been widely publicized, but basically the next step is a newly supernatural Punisher going after a list of villains who tried to kill him, and the one who actually pulled it off. I'd be much more excited if I thought there was a chance any of these villains would actually die, but here's holding that at least one gets it. After reading lots of criticisms that the series has felt disjointed since Frank was disemboweled, I'm happy to see that Remender is working towards creating a cohesive story across the Punisher's death and after-life. On an unrelated note, I really loved the cover to this issue. Frankencastle so alone.

IMAGE:

The Bulletproof Coffin #1: This was amazing. If you didn't buy this comic, slap yourself across the face with a frozen steak and then run back to the rack and grab a copy.

MISC:

The Killer: Modius Vivendi #2 (ARCHAIA, Matz, Luc Jacamon): If it weren't for the fact that The Killer was originally published about 10 years ago, I would look at this comic as a French version of the best American crime books, i.e. Criminal or Scalped. Instead, I have to look at it as another example of European comics being ahead of the American curve. Although each of the aforementioned titles has its own criminal ethics and distinct style, they are all written and drawn with the same level of gritty gravitas; The Killer, however, handles itself with a much cooler, and at times more disturbing, existential attitude toward murder, death, and morality. It's French, what did you expect? The Killer himself is an incredibly fascinating character, one who is fully realized yet still still has the capacity to surprise. The narrative logic of this issue, and how the killer weaves together his general discontent with modern life to his code of ethics and back again is the stuff of truly heady (and wordy) comic book scripting. I think I said it last time, but it deserves being said again; the Killer is a book that takes a seemingly tired story (nameless assassin ponders his morality and life) and proves that a skillful writer/artist team can open up new avenues through even the most familiar stories. If you can put up with a lot of text and some unsettling ethical conclusions, I highly recommend you read this book.

GATTS BOOK OF THE WEEK:

The Bulletproof Coffin (IMAGE, David Hine, Shaky Kane): Big surprise right? This book is unlike anything I've read in awhile, and I mean that in the best way possible. Veteran comic book creators David Hine and Shaky Kane have made a truly worthwhile comic, one that wriggles into your brain like a bad Silver Age hangover. From the looks of this first issue, Hine is writing a love letter to the horror/suspense comics of yesteryear through the lens of oddball meta-horror. After just one issue, I'm entirely impressed. Shaky Kane might not be as big a deal in the US as he is in the UK, which is a shame. His art conveys a sense of the distinctly disturbed atmosphere inherent in even the most outwardly banal setting. Kane is yet another example of why serious comic book fans absolutely need to pay attention to comics from across the pond. In summary, if I had to describe Bulletproof Coffin in an easy, referential way, I'd say "Blotto Jack Kirby got in a fight and passed out in the Twilight Zone." If that doesn't sell you, I don't know what will.

David Mamet's Tips on Writing

I found this floating around the internet; it seems to have quietly made the rounds back in March, but I just found it now and it contains a lot of wisdom from an amazing writer. This was a memo sent from David Mamet to the writers of the, now-cancelled, CBS show The Unit. I guess they either didn't pay attention to his advice, or the TV watchers of America aren't used to well-written TV-shows. Regardless, read it, and figure it out for yourself:

“TO THE WRITERS OF THE UNIT

GREETINGS.

AS WE LEARN HOW TO WRITE THIS SHOW, A RECURRING PROBLEM BECOMES CLEAR.

THE PROBLEM IS THIS: TO DIFFERENTIATE BETWEEN DRAMA AND NON-DRAMA.LET ME BREAK-IT-DOWN-NOW.

EVERYONE IN CREATION IS SCREAMING AT US TO MAKE THE SHOW CLEAR. WE ARE TASKED WITH, IT SEEMS, CRAMMING A SHITLOAD OF INFORMATION INTO ALITTLE BIT OF TIME.

OUR FRIENDS. THE PENGUINS, THINK THAT WE, THEREFORE, ARE EMPLOYED TOCOMMUNICATE INFORMATION — AND, SO, AT TIMES, IT SEEMS TO US.

BUT NOTE:THE AUDIENCE WILL NOT TUNE IN TO WATCH INFORMATION. YOU WOULDN’T, I WOULDN’T. NO ONE WOULD OR WILL. THE AUDIENCE WILL ONLY TUNEIN AND STAY TUNED TO WATCH DRAMA.

QUESTION:WHAT IS DRAMA? DRAMA, AGAIN, IS THE QUEST OF THE HERO TOOVERCOME THOSE THINGS WHICH PREVENT HIM FROM ACHIEVING A SPECIFIC,ACUTE GOAL.

SO: WE, THE WRITERS, MUST ASK OURSELVES OF EVERY SCENE THESE THREE QUESTIONS.

1) WHO WANTS WHAT?
2) WHAT HAPPENS IF HER DON’T GET IT?
3) WHY NOW?

THE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS ARE LITMUS PAPER. APPLY THEM, AND THEIR ANSWER WILL TELL YOU IF THE SCENE IS DRAMATIC OR NOT.

IF THE SCENE IS NOT DRAMATICALLY WRITTEN, IT WILL NOT BE DRAMATICALLY ACTED.

THERE IS NO MAGIC FAIRY DUST WHICH WILL MAKE A BORING, USELESS, REDUNDANT, OR MERELY INFORMATIVE SCENE AFTER IT LEAVES YOUR TYPEWRITER. YOU THE WRITERS, ARE IN CHARGE OF MAKING SURE EVERY SCENEIS DRAMATIC.

THIS MEANS ALL THE “LITTLE” EXPOSITIONAL SCENES OF TWO PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT A THIRD. THIS BUSHWAH (AND WE ALL TEND TO WRITE IT ON THE FIRST DRAFT) IS LESS THAN USELESS, SHOULD IT FINALLY, GOD FORBID, GET FILMED.

IF THE SCENE BORES YOU WHEN YOU READ IT, REST ASSURED IT WILL BORE THE ACTORS, AND WILL, THEN, BORE THE AUDIENCE, AND WE’RE ALL GOING TO BE BACKIN THE BREADLINE.

SOMEONE HAS TO MAKE THE SCENE DRAMATIC. IT IS NOT THE ACTORS JOB (THEACTORS JOB IS TO BE TRUTHFUL). IT IS NOT THE DIRECTORS JOB. HIS OR HER JOB IS TO FILM IT STRAIGHTFORWARDLY AND REMIND THE ACTORS TO TALK FAST. IT ISYOUR JOB.

EVERY SCENE MUST BE DRAMATIC. THAT MEANS: THE MAIN CHARACTER MUST HAVE A SIMPLE, STRAIGHTFORWARD, PRESSING NEED WHICH IMPELS HIM OR HERTO SHOW UP IN THE SCENE.

THIS NEED IS WHY THEY CAME. IT IS WHAT THE SCENE IS ABOUT. THEIR ATTEMPTTO GET THIS NEED MET WILL LEAD, AT THE END OF THE SCENE,TO FAILURE - THISIS HOW THE SCENE IS OVER. IT, THIS FAILURE, WILL, THEN, OF NECESSITY, PROPELUS INTO THE NEXT SCENE.

ALL THESE ATTEMPTS, TAKEN TOGETHER, WILL, OVER THE COURSE OF THE EPISODE, CONSTITUTE THE PLOT.

ANY SCENE, THUS, WHICH DOES NOT BOTH ADVANCE THE PLOT, AND STANDALONE(THAT IS, DRAMATICALLY, BY ITSELF, ON ITS OWN MERITS) IS EITHER SUPERFLUOUS, OR INCORRECTLY WRITTEN.

YES BUT YES BUT YES BUT, YOU SAY: WHAT ABOUT THE NECESSITY OF WRITING INALL THAT “INFORMATION?”

AND I RESPOND “FIGURE IT OUT” ANY DICKHEAD WITH A BLUESUIT CAN BE (AND IS) TAUGHT TO SAY “MAKE IT CLEARER”, AND “I WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUTHIM”.

WHEN YOU’VE MADE IT SO CLEAR THAT EVEN THIS BLUESUITED PENGUIN ISHAPPY, BOTH YOU AND HE OR SHE WILL BE OUT OF A JOB.

THE JOB OF THE DRAMATIST IS TO MAKE THE AUDIENCE WONDER WHAT HAPPENS NEXT. NOT TO EXPLAIN TO THEM WHAT JUST HAPPENED, OR TO*SUGGEST* TOTHEM WHAT HAPPENS NEXT.

ANY DICKHEAD, AS ABOVE, CAN WRITE, “BUT, JIM, IF WE DON’T ASSASSINATE THE PRIME MINISTER IN THE NEXT SCENE, ALL EUROPE WILL BE ENGULFED IN FLAME”

WE ARE NOT GETTING PAID TO REALIZE THAT THE AUDIENCE NEEDS THIS INFORMATION TO UNDERSTAND THE NEXT SCENE, BUT TO FIGURE OUT HOW TOWRITE THE SCENE BEFORE US SUCH THAT THE AUDIENCE WILL BE INTERESTED INWHAT HAPPENS NEXT.

YES BUT, YES BUT YES BUT YOU REITERATE.

AND I RESPOND FIGURE IT OUT.

HOW DOES ONE STRIKE THE BALANCE BETWEEN WITHHOLDING AND VOUCHSAFING INFORMATION? THAT IS THE ESSENTIAL TASK OF THE DRAMATIST. AND THE ABILITY TO DO THAT IS WHAT SEPARATES YOU FROM THE LESSER SPECIES INTHEIR BLUE SUITS.

FIGURE IT OUT.

START, EVERY TIME, WITH THIS INVIOLABLE RULE: THE SCENE MUST BEDRAMATIC. it must start because the hero HAS A PROBLEM, AND IT MUST CULMINATE WITH THE HERO FINDING HIM OR HERSELF EITHER THWARTED OR EDUCATED THAT ANOTHER WAY EXISTS.

LOOK AT YOUR LOG LINES. ANY LOGLINE READING “BOB AND SUE DISCUSS…” IS NOT DESCRIBING A DRAMATIC SCENE.

PLEASE NOTE THAT OUR OUTLINES ARE, GENERALLY, SPECTACULAR. THE DRAMA FLOWS OUT BETWEEN THE OUTLINE AND THE FIRST DRAFT.

THINK LIKE A FILMMAKER RATHER THAN A FUNCTIONARY, BECAUSE, IN TRUTH,YOU ARE MAKING THE FILM. WHAT YOU WRITE, THEY WILL SHOOT.

HERE ARE THE DANGER SIGNALS. ANY TIME TWO CHARACTERS ARE TALKING ABOUT A THIRD, THE SCENE IS A CROCK OF SHIT.

ANY TIME ANY CHARACTER IS SAYING TO ANOTHER “AS YOU KNOW”, THAT IS, TELLING ANOTHER CHARACTER WHAT YOU, THE WRITER, NEED THE AUDIENCE TOKNOW, THE SCENE IS A CROCK OF SHIT.

DO NOT WRITE A CROCK OF SHIT. WRITE A RIPPING THREE, FOUR, SEVEN MINUTE SCENE WHICH MOVES THE STORY ALONG, AND YOU CAN, VERY SOON, BUY A HOUSEIN BEL AIR AND HIRE SOMEONE TO LIVE THERE FOR YOU.

REMEMBER YOU ARE WRITING FOR A VISUAL MEDIUM. MOST TELEVISION WRITING, OURS INCLUDED, SOUNDS LIKE RADIO. THE CAMERA CAN DO THE EXPLAINING FOR YOU. LET IT. WHAT ARE THE CHARACTERS DOING -*LITERALLY*.WHAT ARE THEY HANDLING, WHAT ARE THEY READING. WHAT ARE THEY WATCHING ON TELEVISION, WHAT ARE THEY SEEING.

IF YOU PRETEND THE CHARACTERS CANT SPEAK, AND WRITE A SILENT MOVIE, YOU WILL BE WRITING GREAT DRAMA.

IF YOU DEPRIVE YOURSELF OF THE CRUTCH OF NARRATION, EXPOSITION,INDEED,OF SPEECH. YOU WILL BE FORGED TO WORK IN A NEW MEDIUM - TELLING THE STORY IN PICTURES (ALSO KNOWN AS SCREENWRITING)

THIS IS A NEW SKILL. NO ONE DOES IT NATURALLY. YOU CAN TRAIN YOURSELVESTO DO IT, BUT YOU NEED TO START.

I CLOSE WITH THE ONE THOUGHT: LOOK AT THE SCENE AND ASK YOURSELF “IS ITDRAMATIC? IS IT ESSENTIAL? DOES IT ADVANCE THE PLOT?

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY.

IF THE ANSWER IS “NO” WRITE IT AGAIN OR THROW IT OUT. IF YOU’VE GOT ANY QUESTIONS, CALL ME UP.

LOVE, DAVE MAMET
SANTA MONICA 19 OCTO 05

(IT IS NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY TO KNOW THE ANSWERS, BUT IT IS YOUR, AND MY, RESPONSIBILITY TO KNOW AND TO ASK THE RIGHT Questions OVER AND OVER. UNTIL IT BECOMES SECOND NATURE. I BELIEVE THEY ARE LISTED ABOVE.)”

Mouse Guard: Legends of the Guard #1

I'm new to this series, and I thought a #1 would be a great place to pick it up--and I was right. This first issue gives the feeling of being introductory to the series, establishing the world and what to expect, which works well for me as a new reader. The book is about mice who wear cloaks and fight with swords and speak like they're in fantasy novels, defending villages from snakes, hawks, and other natural predators. That's all I knew going in, and that's really all you need to know to have a good time.

Mouse Guard: Legends of the Guard has a neat premise: whoever tells the best tale gets his bar tab erased, but every other storyteller must pay off his tab within a week. Apparently, these mice like to drink ale more than Peter O'Toole, as having to pay off one's tab would hurt the mouse pocketbook. There are three stories in the first issue, and they vary in quality.

The first, "The Battle of The Hawk's Mouse and The Fox's Mouse," was my personal favorite, because it had the most eloquent writing and prettiest art. There was one standout page in which the text was written on a banner that swept around the characters as they battled, and moved the battle clockwise around the page, from upper right to center, with the battle's climax in the center. The sense of movement really gave the battle a momentum you don't really see in mainstream comics--usually you'd see a lead up page, and then a splash on the following page. This story gave a nice change of pace from what I normally read.

The second story, "A Bargain in the Dark," was very fast, and was about a mouse who carries an injured bat to safety. Ted Naifeh, the writer and artist of this story, does a fine enough job, but I feel like he didn't have enough space to tell his story. When the bat tells the mouse about his first flight when he was a pup, it's crammed into three panels, and goes by too quickly. Ditto for the mouse, Tristram, who hints at a story of lost love, but gets no space to tell his tale. Maybe that's the point, that the mouse telling the story is only able to tell his one tale, but I really would have appreciated more depth.

The final story, "Oleg the Wise," felt like it was over before it started. A mouse sees a soothsayer who tells him his steed will be the death of him, so he gets rid of the ferret he was riding. He does not have the ferret put to death, but rather taken far away. Years later, when he gets word the ferret has died, he asks to be taken to its grave, where a snake lies in wait. This story felt like one I'd heard a few times before, though I still enjoyed it, to some degree.

I'm glad I picked up the first of this new series, and I'm looking forward to picking up the collections of the previous series. Apparently, I'm two series behind, which shouldn't be hard to catch up on. The series publishes bi-monthly, and I don't think I'll be able to wait two months for more mouse action.

More GL in the Lamp-Light!

This image is from the same licensing show at which Warner Bros. is unveiling the Green Lantern Movie poster.

Again, thanks SuperHeroHype!

The placement of GL in this shows that WB is really pushing to get the GL brand out there in advance of the movie, so they must have a lot of faith it in. Though, they probably had a lot of faith in the last Superman movie as well.

Green Lantern does looks good up front there.

The placement of some of the other heroes is troubling me though. I mean, Zatanna is on par with Martian Manhunter? A stage magician and a nude green alien?

And Wonder Woman and The Flash are a tier behind them? With Blue Devil basically on the same tier?

Very odd.